Snails = snow mails.

"Because of the impending snowstorm, we have decided to postpone Connie Cepko’s seminar for this afternoon. Please distribute this information to your departments. Thanks and enjoy the snow!"

"Due to the inclement weather we recommend that if it is possible for you to go home that you do try to go before the weather further deteriorates. The administrative (admin, lab ops, and finance) staff will be leaving in the next few hours."

"Apparently there has been some anxiety about the fact that the admin staff left early. Don't worry, they filled the beer fridge before they left."